Friday, June 21, 2013

From the Cereal Aisle: Bran News

Product: Bran News Cereal
Company: Ralston
Years: 1988 - ?



 Just a quick post today, and it's only because I'm always amazed when I run across cereals I've never heard of before that were from my lifetime, as I think I was rather observant when it came to the cereal aisle on a Tuesday night while shopping with mom back in the 80's. But really, when I look at this product, it's easy to figure out why it never got my attention.

Bran.

Bran is not fun. Nobody likes bran. The only people who eat bran are only eating it because they have to for a medical reason, and if they tell you otherwise, they are damn dirty liars. Kids especially don't like bran. I mean, just the sound of it...........bran. BRaaaaaaaan. BrAaAaAaAn.

No thanks mom. I'll just starve instead.



But wait, there's a touch of cinnamon!!! Doesn't matter, if you put a bow tie on a turd, it's still a turd.
They also tried an apple cinnamon version. What did they expect to happen when you have BRAN in your name.

I'm guessing that if you are under the age of 40, you also don't remember Bran News.
What a stupid name. It sounds like you should be eating a bowl of shredded newspaper.
The only person who probably would remember this is my grandma, because she used to eat a lot of bran (as old people often will), but I can't ask her, because she's not alive anymore. And I imagine all the bran had something to do with it. No proof, just a hunch.

Seriously, if I can get 5 people to respond that they actually remember this cereal, I'll eat a giant bowl of bran myself.

Guess I'll be safe.


5 comments:

  1. I remember it. My mother had a couple of boxes that she got when I was in high school (1988 or 1989 would be my guess for the year) that I polished off. My recollection was that it was quite tasty, actually.

    ReplyDelete
  2. They had a great commercial with Ron Masak impersonating Lou Costello. Wonder if that's still around someplace.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Better start looking for a box. I have actually consumed Bran News, in part because of the groan worthy ad referenced above with the homophone gag. It's Bran News! (I know it's new, what is it?).

    Imagine very sad Cheerios.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Better start looking for a box. I have actually consumed Bran News, in part because of the groan worthy ad referenced above with the homophone gag. It's Bran News! (I know it's new, what is it?).

    Imagine very sad Cheerios.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I vaguely remember the commercial for it. I remember being about 8 years old at the time. I also remember devouring it within a week.

    ReplyDelete