Kool-Aid Rock-A-Dile Red
Company: Kraft Foods
Years- Early 90's
In the late 80's/early 90's, Kool-Aid had a bit of an identity crisis. The Kool-Aid man was asked to share the limelight with a series of new characters for some new flavors that were being introduced, and like the gentleman he is, said "Oh-Yeah!" (which is usually what he says about most things, so he could have been answering any number of questions at the time, like "Did you catch Jersey Shore last night?", or, "Did you remember to flush when you were done?") Anyway, Kool-Aid rolled out a series of new flavors (which in due time will all be discussed) and the final one of that series to hit the shelves in the early 90's was called Rock-A-Dile Red. It was a Fruit Punch flavored drink, which didn't really make it stand out from any of the other flavors they already had (a Fruit Flavored drink? How novel.......) But the success of Rock-A-Dile Red and the rest of the "Character Flavors" (Purlesaurus Rex, Sharleberry Fin, Great Bluedini, and Incrediberry) wasn't so much the new flavor as it was the advertising avalanche that went along with them. Kids saw them on TV and had to try them, so they became a smash hit.
Rock-A-Dile red was released in the early 90's, and only lasted a few years (the novelty of the "Character" flavors had started to fade). Even though it was not being produced anymore, it could still be found on store shelves for a few years until the surplus could be used up.
The character on the packages was an awesome dinosaur who was WAY cooler then you (ok....way cooler then me, too.....). He wore a shirtless collar and tie. That wasn't a type-o. I never meant to type collarless shirt. Look for yourself. See? How cool is that?
Plus, he wore sunglasses and played a saxophone. It looks like someone crammed a bunch of fruit into his saxaphone when he wasn't looking, and he's so good, he just blows that shit out there with ease. You know who else played a saxophone and was way cooler then you (fine, and me too........)?
Problem is I've completely forgotten at this point what point I was trying to make. So let's just review:
Rock-A-Dile Red (the Flavor): Not really anything special - Red drink, fruity
Rock-A-Dile Red (the cartoon): Cooler then you and me (but not Kenny G)
"Hey, that rhymed!": yes, I know
Can still be purchased at: Nowhere. Discontinued. Not for Sale. if you can find one on Ebay (or in the back of a cupboard that hasn't been cleaned out in 20 years like I did) congratulations.
Is it on the shelves at Gone But Not Forgotten Groceries?: It is now.
Feel free to share your stories of Rock-A-Dile Red in the comment section below.